RespiteMatch.com Health Blog

Help For The Caregiver

Whatever your age, you are a caregiver if you provide care that helps a frail elderly or disabled person live at home. In fact, 80% of all our Nation’s health care is provided by informal caregivers such as you.

Caring for a relative or friend may be something you never expected or wanted. It can develop slowly or happen suddenly. Few are trained to be caregivers, and there is much to learn to make caring easier.

This brochure will help you understand what caring for an older person may require and how to find help when you need it.

Your Changing Role

At various times you may be manager, organizer, observer, consumer, and legal, financial and medical planner. It’s certain that your role will change constantly as your carereceiver’s condition changes.

Problems You May Face

Health problems of the elderly can be many and complex. Physical illnesses may be difficult to detect as symptoms may be diminished, absent, delayed in onset or not characteristic of the same illness in a younger person.

Changes may occur in vision, hearing, taste, touch and smell. Such sensory changes can lead to physical difficulties. Poor vision, for example, may result in a fall. Reduced hearing can be misconstrued as confusion or negative behavior. While such losses can have a profound effect on a person’s ability to remain independent, helpful adjustments can often be made.

Mental changes disturb both the elderly person and you when you may see a decline in intellectual function. Warning symptoms include depression, confusion, disorientation, inattention, agitation or excitement. Symptoms can be due to organic changes or emotional reactions to some recent loss or physical illness. Even poor nutrition or drug reactions can produce altered mental states. Understanding the cause can assist treatment which may sometimes arrest or reverse the decline in functioning. Consult a physician when symptoms persist.

Know the Facts

Find out about the illness or disability. Doctors and other health professionals can tell you the medical and behavioral signs, the length of illness or disability, and if your responsibilities may change.

Ask medical professionals what your carereceiver’s condition may mean for you! For instance, people with declining mental faculties may progress from minor forgetfulness to total lack of memory. Therefore, the amount and type of care or supervision you provide will change as the condition changes.

Your Reactions as a Caregiver

A confusing mix of emotions is normal–many caregivers have similar feelings. Recognize your emotions and deal with them.

You may be troubled by feelings that you didn’t expect. For example:

At the same time you feel love and concern, you may feel hostility or resentment; anger at your elderly parent or spouse; sadness or grief; helplessness and embarrassment.
Care for Yourself

Caregiving can be both satisfying and stressful. You may feel pressure from your job or family. Know the warning signs that you are reaching a breaking point:

Shortness of temper
sleeplessness
physical problems such as loss of appetite, headaches, fatigue, shortness of breath and dizziness
withdrawal from people close to you
financial problems
disinterest in normal leisure activities
inability to accept help from others
Another person depends on you! If you are not in good health, that person may suffer.

Respite Care

Finding help begins with you. Taking a break from caregiving is one of the most important things you can do to sustain your caregiving ability and desire.

Respite care, or taking time out from caregiving gives you time to spend with friends or alone, time to relax, take a vacation or engage in a hobby or sport. The person you are caring for can also benefit from seeing and being around others while you are taking your break. Medical experts agree that frail elderly or disabled people should be encouraged to do as much for themselves as possible. Involvement with others is an excellent way to spur interest in and work towards independent activity.

Set Goals

Setting reasonable goals helps. What do you hope to accomplish by providing care? Develop a “job description” and think realistically about what you can, can’t or won’t do.

Others Also Care

Involve other family members and friends and neighbors with giving care, and keep them involved.

Clear-cut roles for family and friends can let everyone know what they should do to help. Family conferences are useful to develop goals, make long-term plans, share and develop information and feelings, and plan for emergency or vacation back-up assistance for the primary caregiver.

Be specific in your requests for help. Consider what each person can do, such as providing help while you’re gone, or spending a few hours a week talking or reading to your carereceiver. Be realistic about how long you’ll need this help. Consider a “trial period” so all parties can see how it works.

What Help is Available?

Helpful support services are available through your local office for the aging, public health nursing services and governmental, nonprofit or private agencies.

In New York State support services include:

counseling
home delivered meals
transportation
daycare
senior center programs
legal services
in-home services such as home health aides, homemakers and visiting nurses
friendly visitors and
respite programs to provide care when you need a break.
It’s important to know the eligibility requirements and procedures for getting these services. Some services are free, some have a fee and others are available on a sliding fee scale. Regardless of income level, seek appropriate help if you need it, in consultation with the elderly carereceiver.

You may be able to receive special training for people who are caring for someone at home. You may wish to join support group discussions with other caregivers to learn from their experiences, share frustrations and problem solve together.

How to Locate Help

It can be a tedious process to find, obtain and use support services. Local offices for the aging can help provide you with information and refer you to an appropriate source of help.

Each local office for the aging has service programs such as transportation, home care, home delivered meals and congregate meal programs. They also provide information and assistance with programs such as Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid.

Most local offices for the aging also provide the Expanded In Home Service for the Elderly Program (EISEP) which may provide evaluation and case management for your carereceiver. EISEP augments your caring role to help the carereceiver continue living at home. Your local office can also provide information about EPIC — New York’s program which helps older people pay for prescription drugs.

Call your local office for the aging. See this directory to find the telephone number and address of the office nearest you.